Euromillions, Eurovision, sausages...

Funny the things that I find as I'm walking to work.

Work, that’s a laugh – I’ll try again. Funny the things I find walking to my expensive hobby. Yes, the world of glass is very slow at the moment – could be the hot weather, could be the recession, could be that people have decided glass is too glassy and are drinking out of wooden beakers.

Yes, I think that by now you may have guessed that my blog post is going to be PrEtTy RanDom today.

I bought a ticket for the Euromillions last night. I was convinced I stood a pretty good chance as when I checked my pockets I had exactly two pounds in change and it included my lucky penny – you know, the one I found last week. EXACTLY two pounds... IT WAS A SIGN! Exactly two pounds and my lucky penny! To keep the luck with me I asked for a lucky dip and DIDN’T LOOK AT THE NUMBERS (that always works) and when I got home I stuck my lucky ticket FACE DOWN to the kitchen cabinet to keep in the luck and just in case I was tempted to peek. Yes, THAT WOULD DO IT.

I went to bed happy and CONVINCED that I would wake up a millionaire and able to retreat to that Greek Island that is waiting for me in the Aegean. I dreamt of naked maidens iced champagne and white cotton suits and awoke excited and ready to begin my new life.

Okay – let’s cut to the chase, I know that the suspense is killing you.
DID I WIN?!?!

DID I FCUK!

Not even a sausage… not even a singing one.

So today on my walk I found a sheet of handwritten music. It’s called K.M.S. which I imagine stands for the title of the piece - Kiss Me Sweetly or Kick My Shins or (for the gangsta rappers amongst you) Knob Me Slap - something like that anyway.

I’m afraid that I don’t read music so can’t recognise the tune but I am convinced IT IS A SIGN!

And this sign means….........................

TONIGHT ENGLEBERT HUMPERDUNKLE WILL WIN THE EUROVISION SONG CONTEST.

Oh yes he will, just mark my words.
Oh no he won't.