Thursday 6 March 2014

Staying away from tripe…


Two days into Lent and I'm still managing to stay off the tripe. Yes, I've been observing lent my whole life and it's made me a better person - even though it’s been a real struggle. This year I almost gave up Lent for Lent, but then I remembered all those other Lents, the sacrifices I’ve made over the years, and thought better of it. Hang-gliding, One man and his Dog, Eastenders, The Bay City Rollers, Hair shirts, and now tripe, have all been, at one time or another, sacrificed for forty long days and forty even longer nights in the pursuit of purity.

Mind you, these days there is so little left for me to give up. Most of my ‘vices’ have fizzled out of their own accord or been confiscated by my wife. It gets harder and harder each year to find a worthy ‘Lent-ill’ as I call them.

My life seems to be a constant struggle between abstinence and excess, a little like ‘The Fight Between Carnival and Lent’ by my old mate Pieter Bruegel the younger.

As many of you may know, I never miss an opportunity to show off young Pieter’s work, regardless of how tenuous the link. Back in 1559 he depicted the Lent festival, as celebrated in the Southern Netherlands, when he painted the contrast between two sides of contemporary life at the time. It’s all about balance you see: the appearance of the inn on the left side - for fun and a jolly good time, and a church on the right side - for enforced obedience and guilt. Well-behaved children near the church, a riotous beerfest at the pub.

I’m clearly at the Inn guzzling down a pint or two, although it’s not easy to see the pious guilt on my face. Yes, I’m crying all down my underwear as I drink myself into another drunken haze. Woe is me!

As James Blunt sings: ‘My life is brilliant.’ Yes, my tongue IS firmly in my cheek. But, like the figure of King Carnival in the painting (he of the pork pie head, bulging red pants, and big sausage on a stick) bidding a left-handed farewell as he raises his eyes to the sky, Lent will eventually triumph. All praise the Holy Jesus!

Sausage anyone?

Oh well, after reading this back it seems like I didn’t manage to stay off the tripe after all - perhaps I should give up blogging for Lent.

5 comments:

  1. Neil Barrett on FB
    I wish there was more depictions of contemporary life painted, its a great insight of what real people might have been like in the past. Rather than painted images of Royalty and Religion. Hogarth was another favourite of mine.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Andrew Height
    Here you go Neil Barrett
    Andrew Height's photo.

    Neil Barrett Brilliant!
    Where has it come from?

    Andrew Height
    I'd like to say it was mine. But sadly not. http://www.dickjewell.com/

    dick jewell home page
    www.dickjewell.com

    Neil Barrett
    Like the cheekiness, Are you Hales Melvin Bragg or what!

    Andrew Height
    You guessed!

    ReplyDelete
  3. 2 days into Lent and I'm still managing to stay off the tripe.

    Carmel Payne, Nicola Moore, Siobhan Harkin and 2 others like this.

    Nick Jones
    http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/.../lent-bollocks...
    Lent ‘bollocks’
    www.thedailymash.co.uk
    LENT is bollocks, it has been confirmed.

    Tim Preston
    Respect

    Andrew Height
    I've been observing lent my whole life and it's made me a better person Nick Jones.

    Flora Marriott
    What a struggle. Well done you. I'm not stepping in dog poo for lent

    David Bell
    Do you eat it lashed with malt vinegar?

    Neil Barrett
    What no more Blogs?

    Carmel Payne
    That can't be easy !

    Paul Whitehouse
    Still writing it though Andrew!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Exactly right Paul Whitehouse

    ReplyDelete
  5. I have given up Lent for Lent.

    Linda Kemp, Clare Pritchard, Nicola Moore and 8 others like this.

    Kathryn Salthouse
    Good one

    David Bell
    Boom Boom

    Fraser Stewart
    I've given up sleeping for Lent…and for the rest of my life.

    Kevin Parrott
    To be honest, I always feel guilty as I never give anything up for Lent. So........ I've decided to give up guilt!

    Cloe Fyne
    I've given up booze

    Tim Preston
    I tried giving up being a tosser for lent once but I couldn't do it

    Richard Shore
    I've given up fags and heroin

    Andrew Height
    Richard Shore you are addicted to life, fags and heroin are small potatoes ( I think they call them Jersey Royals).

    Andrew Height
    Tim, you are not a tosser... and I should know.

    Linda Kemp
    I gave up giving up ages ago - aren't we humans supposed to be good at NOT giving up?

    Tim Preston
    I think that forcing yourself to give things up is a form of denial. Denial is a form of non acceptance which leads to hatred and war. If we didn't have Lent we probably wouldn't have seen the need to invade Afghanistan

    Richard Shore
    What happens if you give up war for lent?

    Nick Jones
    You overdose on war at Christmas.

    Nick Jones
    At least I think that's what Robbie Williams was on about.

    ReplyDelete