Misty has asked me to publish this letter on her behalf.
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Adoring public

Firstly I’d like to say sorry for my outburst last week. I don’t know what came over me. Maybe not being nominated for a single Oscar or even a Grammy had something to do with it and not getting a sniff of a Golden Globe or a whiff of an Emmy, didn’t help my mood much which (particularly at this time of year plagued with SAD as I am) is at best variable.

Even so, as Clarence the lion always said, you must always put your public first (and leave the Gazelles for seconds), so please accept my humble apologies. It is impossible to defend the undefendable, but in my defence that hissing Foodies woman has been feeding me turkey in a rich jelly morning, noon, and night and Mu-Mu knows what chemicals it contains. I’m bound to be imbalanced by all those colourants and additives. According to the can it even contains 2.5% ash and I didn’t even know that turkey’s smoked!

Still that isn’t really an excuse for my inexcusable outburst so I won’t use it as such. Although, I have had a few emotional problems recently as a result of that whirling dervish girl continually playing raucous music at full volume whilst spinning around and around on the spot. It’s almost impossible to sleep through it and I get quite upset if I don’t get my full 23 hours a day. I’ve asked that hissing Hisfault to shut her up or at least get me a pair of ear muffs but all he does is smile down at me in that inane way of his and pat my head like a dog!

It is making me TENSE! It is making me TERSE! It is making me very hissy-hussing FURIOUS! No wonder I’m so hissing VOLATILE ! I need a nice long course in ANGER MANAGEMENT or at the very least to catch a nice little mousey to take my ANGST OUT ON! - but this hissing bell stops that DOESN’T IT!

But then (deep breaths, count to ten) that isn’t your fault is it? No, it isn’t my adoring publics fault at all. I really shouldn’t take it out on you. After all you (well at least most of you) are not only my followers, my fans, my devotees, but I also regard you as my friends. I love you all (well almost all)!

There is a myth that cats never say sorry. I think you’d agree that this letter proves that nothing could be further from the hissing truth. On behalf of the nominating bodies of the various aforementioned societies, Hisfault, Foodies, that whirling dervish girl thing, the company who make my cat food, and the time of year, I unreservedly apologise and send you each my deepest respect.

Misty