Friday 9 May 2014

Lost socks...

Thank God today is National Lost Sock Memorial Day, without it there probably wouldn't have been a blog this evening. Yes, it’s a slow news day in my world.

I don’t know how many socks I’ve lost over the years, but at the rate of just two a year it would add up to well over 100. Multiply that by every sock wearer in the country and that is one hell of a hill of lost hose.

Those poor lost socks, just where do they all go? Is there a land of lost socks somewhere, or do they simply disappear into another time or dimension through a black hole? Maybe it’s caused by one legged aliens sneaking into the nation’s sock drawers at night, or mice looking for a cosy sleeping bag to take back to their holes. It could even be the work of a single culprit - let’s call him the Sock Snatcher – who, like those men that steal ladies panties from washing lines, just can’t get enough single socks to satisfy his single sock fetish. Ah, the sniff of a fresh sock…

It isn’t just the lost sock either. How does the solo sock that’s left behind feel? Lonely I guess. Somehow I just can’t bear to throw that poor singleton sock away and they languish in my sock drawer hoping that one day their partner will return, which of course they never do. Sometimes, if they are the same colour, I pair them up with another solo sock and wear them out occasionally. Well, it’s a bit of a treat for both of them, a little company, a day out, and nobody ever seems to notice that they don’t completely match.

Of course, there must be lots of uses for those socks that I can’t pair up.

I’ll have a think about that and get back to you.

14 comments:

  1. Sock puppet theatre... ;-)

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  2. Paul Whitehouse on FB
    Mate I'm a bit worried that you have nude pannyhose (American pronunciation) in yer sock drawer.... Are you coming out?

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    Replies
    1. Andrew Height
      It's my hobby Paul Whitehouse. I'm a bank robber.

      Delete
  3. Simon Day on FB
    Being a long time pedestrian I am often surprised by the sight of a solitary sock lying on the pavement or road. How does a sock slip off the foot and work it's way out of the shoe without the wearer being alerted? Which leads me to believe that before the common sock was domesticated it was a migratory beast and every once in a while the sock feels compelled by it's not quite redundant genes to follow the routes to ancient sock breeding grounds. I also suspect that these ancient breeding grounds are near to where my Gran lives, hence the constant gifts of socks on birthdays and at Christmas.

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    Replies
    1. Andrew Height
      Pure genius Simon Day

      Delete
    2. Simon Day on FB
      One day I shall mount an expedition to confirm my theories

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  4. Clare Pritchard on FB
    Exactly!!!!

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  5. Sarah Whateley on FB
    Here, apparently.
    Sarah Whateley's photo.

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  6. Cloe Fyne on FB
    Down the drain in the washer! Under our houses is just a sea of socks! That's what I think anyway

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  7. Colin Tickle on FB
    http://www.sockloss.com/one_missing.html

    GE L.O.S.S. - Why Does Only One Go Missing? - Sock Loss - Washing Machine
    www.sockloss.com
    Every year, tens of millions of socks mysteriously disappear. The phenomenon cre...See more

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  8. Paula Braham on FB
    When you find out could you let me know please, I must have lost hundreds lol

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  9. Liam Reeve on FB
    Lost Property?

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  10. David Bell on FB
    Sock heaven

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