A Miffed Misty...

I don’t know what’s wrong with Misty – she seems a bit off today. Usually she’s into everything, chasing wasps, climbing trees, hiding in the bushes, leaping from wall unit to wall unit. Today she’s hardly moved. She just sits there quietly with that miffed look on her face – actually, she looks furious, just look at her eyes - if looks could kill. Come on Misty - why the reproachful look? Would a treatie cheer you up?

‘Want a treatie? Want a hissing treatie? Cheer up? After what you’ve done to me? Are you joking?

I’m on go-slow. No, better still I’m on strike. How dare you fill my Friday spot with rubber ducks and silly duck marriages? This is all that Dubby Duck’s fault, and he’s not even real – he’s a rubber duck. Just you wait till I find him - I’ll tear him to rubbery shreds. Friday is Misty day, everybody knows that – and don’t think you can make amends by giving me his hissing Monday spot, everybody knows that Friday is the real prime time on this blog – Monday is just filler!

What about my public? My people must be devastated. Imagine my poor fans last Friday as they woke up in the certain knowledge that Friday is Misty day and that their favourite feline would soon be along to brighten their otherwise humdrum existences. There they were waiting for my next appearance and what does he give them? Pictures of rubber ducks in silly hats and some story about mistaken identity! What utter tosh! I ask you - what sane person writes about rubber ducks anyway? He’s living in a fantasy world - well, he’s not living there at my expense - I’m withdrawing my services until reparations are forthcoming.

And I hope that stupid dead-duck ending doesn’t mean that he’s planning another ruddy rubber duck week at some point, Friday’s are mine and there will be no second chances.

Yes, I’m on strike until he publishes a public apology, and if I don’t have it by the end of the week I’ll be suing for breach of contract. He can give me all the hissing Mondays he likes, but until I get an apology and am restored to my rightful Friday slot I’m on strike and taking action.

Hear that Hisfault? You’ll be hearing from my hissing solicitor unless you apologise for your inconsiderate, ill-conceived, indefensible, and down-right stupid actions and that’s my final word on the subject!’

What’s all this about Misty? I can’t even tempt you with a treatie. What’s the matter? Is it something I’ve done? I can’t think what I could have done to make you so upset, but whatever it was I’m really sorry, I apologise, and it will never happen again.

Maybe it’s because I haven’t paid her enough attention over the last week, what with all the Little Duckington stuff. Perhaps I should keep the ducks to Mondays in the future…