Meteors, DA14, aliens, Mayan predictions, space rockets, dinosaurs, Asteroid nudging and DON’T PANIC… here we go…

I was surprised to hear about the meteor over Russia this morning. Checking YouTube my first thought was that it was a hoax, those videos looked too clean to be real, but after checking it with the BBC I was convinced – well, they can’t lie all the time can they?

‘So, Chickenski Lickenski the sky has fallen over Russia.’ I thought…

My next thoughts were of that asteroid winging its way through space towards us at five miles a second, eight times as fast as a speeding bullet. The catchily named 2012 DA14 is the size of an office block and will miss us by 17,000 miles or so they say, but are they really sure?

‘Odd… Is there a connection between the two?’ I thought.

By this time my mind was racing. What if the Russian meteorite was a chunk of DA14? What if it wasn’t going to miss us at all and ‘they’ sent up a missile to nudge it into a new trajectory as an experiment to see if it could be done? What if it the mission went wrong and instead of some gentle nudging it blew off a huge chunk which crashed into the Earth, falling (rather fortunately) into a Russian lake but injuring 400 people in the process? What if DA14 is at this very moment on a new course and heading straight for London, ready to flatten the city in one hell of an explosion that could set off a chain reaction and destroy us all in a cataclysmic event just like the one that wiped out the mighty dinosaurs?

Wait a minute! What if that meteorite wasn’t a meteorite at all but an alien scout ship launched from behind DA14 in order to check out the Mayak atomic waste storage and treatment centre in the Chelyabinsk region of Russia? What if the Russians tracked it on their radar and decided to blow it out of the sky before it could land? What if, at this very minute, the aliens are preparing to counter-attack by steering their asteroid Mother Ship towards us on a collision course?

Wait! What if the Mayans were right after all, just a tiny bit out with their calculations? What if this is the end of days and we are all doomed? Would ‘they’ tell us? I don’t think that they would, would they?

Calm down, calm down. Two big astronomical events in a single day is a bit of a coincidence but that has to be what it is.

Doesn’t it?

Oh well, not long to wait now. Drink anybody?