Duck Dayz...

Cloud nine...

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I think that you can work this one out for yourself.

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New ducks on the pond...

I have some new additions to my duck family. They’ve been given to me by people who probably think that it is better to humour my duck delusions rather than confront me with them - just in case it ruffles my feathers and I go quackers or something.

Here they all are. The one with the hair and bikini is Doris Double ‘D’ Duck. She’s not as brazen as she looks; she’s actually quite sweet and has a heart of gold. You may have seen her on TV - she had a waddle-on part in ‘Benidorm’ as Johnny Vegas’s bath time plaything. Thanks to Martine for introducing her to me.

The big red guy is Deville Duck, now he hasn’t got a heart of gold; in fact his heart is pretty black. I’m not sure what he’s going to get up to but I’m certain that it’ll be nothing good. He reminds me a little of Errol Flynn, he’s got the look of a pirate don’t you think? I bet the person who sent him along to my band of merry ducks was pleased to be rid of him - right Sue?

The blue, black and white duck with the orange bill and happy smile is Dizzie Duck. Dizzie is really cool; he loves jazz and used to play horn in a band with Duck Ellington. He’s been a little down on his duck luck recently, so when Nicki C. found him playing in a bar in New York for breadcrumbs she pointed him in my direction. Don’t worry Nicki, I’ll take good care of him.

Finally that little yellow fellah is Dinky Duck. Dinky was found wandering the streets of York in dazed duck fashion by my daughter Cloë. Not one to pass a duck in distress Cloë immediately thought of me and sent him along to join the ever growing populace of Little Duckington. Another bill to feed, goodness knows where I’m going to keep them all.

Anyway here they are being welcomed into the family by my original duck, Dubby. What a lot he has to answer for.

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