Crispy Jesus...

Jesus turns up everywhere doesn’t he? Sometimes I think that he’s almost as well known and recognisable as David Beckham. True, you don’t see Jesus in many fashion magazines or in TV ads, but then you don’t see Beckham hanging on church walls or miraculously appearing on crisps. Well, at least not yet. Although it’ll probably happen at some time when Beckham is canonised and becomes Saint Becks.

Talking of crisps I wonder what Jesus’ favourite flavour was? Was he a salt and vinegar or a Worcestershire sauce man? In fact, was he a man at all or one of those alien beings who laugh at our potatoes? I doubt that he was big on smoky bacon, prawn cocktail or even scampi fries, what with him being King of the Jews and everything, and now that I come to think about it vinegar probably had some bad connotations for him. Maybe he was more of a ready salted kind of chap, or a roast chicken fan, or perhaps his favourite was Jesus onion…see what I did there?

Who knows? Perhaps Jesus miracled-up his own flavours: wine and water, ass and oxen, manna, and of course good old Egyptian plague flavour containing  blood and water, frogs, gnats, flies, locusts, emulsifiers and the odd artificial flavouring or two; like frankincense and myrrh. I was going to include donkey, but that’s probably already been done - even if we don’t know about it.

Anyway, whichever his favourite flavour was I bet Jesus could make five bags of crisps go an awfully long way.