Gosh and Golly (ATTENTION - banned word - not gosh the other one) day three of my new Blogging quest and I’ve already run out of things to say. So taking my blog cue from the Robertson’s marmalade that’s in my cupboard and with which I spread my toast this morning, let’s turn up the heat and get a tiny bit controversial. The Golly has fled the label long ago and that bloody Peruvian Paddington Bear replaced him. Peruvians do that you know, come over here stealing our jobs. Take Phil Manzernera for instance, without him I might have been Roxy Music’s lead guitarist - with a little practice, been a trifle older and cooler, and if I’d only owned and played the guitar in the first place. But I digress again.
Yes, the Golly has disappeared into thin cut air and unbelievably it was way back in 2002!
Just goes to show how old some of my jams are. Until the 1980s, Robertson's mascot
was not Golly but Golliwog (horror horror!). Robertson's adopted its very black mascot in
the Edwardian period. It was a brilliant marketing stroke. "Golliwog" brand-marked the
product and, in 1928, inspired a spin-off campaign. In return for tokens from the jam pots,
kids like me could get enamelled and very shiny golly brooches and badges. Something
to look forward to in those days of world and cold wars, nuclear threat, social poverty,
rationing, three-day weeks, and power cuts (no scented candles back then). I had a few
(Golliwog badges that is, not scented candles) and I really liked them, even wore them
to school on my home-knitted jumpers. But today it’s the type of thing you hide away
at the back of a drawer in a locked box - like a Prince Andrew and Fergie wedding mug -
and only bring out at midnight under cover of disguise (a non-controversial disguise I
might add, not a Nazi officer, a showboat minstrel, or a drag queen) and only when the
house is totally empty apart from yourself and all the doors and windows are locked.
Yes, there is shame and outrage in even touching these things today, God forbid you
actually wear them in the street, protests would abound, maybe even stonings, but just
why I don’t really understand.
Just goes to show how old some of my jams are. Until the 1980s, Robertson's mascot
was not Golly but Golliwog (horror horror!). Robertson's adopted its very black mascot in
the Edwardian period. It was a brilliant marketing stroke. "Golliwog" brand-marked the
product and, in 1928, inspired a spin-off campaign. In return for tokens from the jam pots,
kids like me could get enamelled and very shiny golly brooches and badges. Something
to look forward to in those days of world and cold wars, nuclear threat, social poverty,
rationing, three-day weeks, and power cuts (no scented candles back then). I had a few
(Golliwog badges that is, not scented candles) and I really liked them, even wore them
to school on my home-knitted jumpers. But today it’s the type of thing you hide away
at the back of a drawer in a locked box - like a Prince Andrew and Fergie wedding mug -
and only bring out at midnight under cover of disguise (a non-controversial disguise I
might add, not a Nazi officer, a showboat minstrel, or a drag queen) and only when the
house is totally empty apart from yourself and all the doors and windows are locked.
Yes, there is shame and outrage in even touching these things today, God forbid you
actually wear them in the street, protests would abound, maybe even stonings, but just
why I don’t really understand.
Back in my boydom Noddy fought off Gollywog’s very rarely, the Gollywogs were usually
portrayed as happy scamps, even heroes, rather than blackhearted villains (can I say
blackhearted?). It was usually the goblins and monkeys who emerged consistently as
villains and golliwogs along with bears were usually portrayed as just being naughty
which was probably why I loved them. Doesn’t everybody secretly want to be naughty?
I know I do. And why was it the poor Golly who was airbrushed out of Blyton history and
not the goblins who replaced them or maybe even the monkeys or bears? It seems a bit
unfair to Gollywogs to me, a bit police state, USSR, Stalinesque, racist even, particularly
with what those bloody goblins get away with all the time. I say send all the goblins home
to where they bloody came from. Does anyone know where that is, is it in Europe? I know
that there are Gnomes in Zurich but I’m neutral on Gnomes.
portrayed as happy scamps, even heroes, rather than blackhearted villains (can I say
blackhearted?). It was usually the goblins and monkeys who emerged consistently as
villains and golliwogs along with bears were usually portrayed as just being naughty
which was probably why I loved them. Doesn’t everybody secretly want to be naughty?
I know I do. And why was it the poor Golly who was airbrushed out of Blyton history and
not the goblins who replaced them or maybe even the monkeys or bears? It seems a bit
unfair to Gollywogs to me, a bit police state, USSR, Stalinesque, racist even, particularly
with what those bloody goblins get away with all the time. I say send all the goblins home
to where they bloody came from. Does anyone know where that is, is it in Europe? I know
that there are Gnomes in Zurich but I’m neutral on Gnomes.
My gran made me a Gollywog when I was a toddler. He had back woollen hair, a red
knitted jacket, blue knitted trousers, a yellow bow tie and two white shirt button eyes.
Yes, he was very colourful (can I say colourful? I know I can’t say coloured. Could I say
a toy of colour I wonder?). Have you noticed that you don’t see Gollywogs in the toyshops
these days? But the monkeys are still there, and plush goblins, even fluffy carrots! As if
you’d ever really feel the need to cuddle a bloody goblin or a carrot.
knitted jacket, blue knitted trousers, a yellow bow tie and two white shirt button eyes.
Yes, he was very colourful (can I say colourful? I know I can’t say coloured. Could I say
a toy of colour I wonder?). Have you noticed that you don’t see Gollywogs in the toyshops
these days? But the monkeys are still there, and plush goblins, even fluffy carrots! As if
you’d ever really feel the need to cuddle a bloody goblin or a carrot.
We are in a purity spiral I’m told, although I’m not at all sure what that is. Apparently
‘first morality binds and then morality blinds’ and slowly innocent people become as
shunned as Enid Blyton and her Gollywogs. It’s happened throughout history, but
usually to religious groups or races, not toys. Of course, the Robertson's Golly was and
is a racist icon if you want it to be, as was my knitted Gollywog too I suppose. But my
Golly was just a toy to me and my metal badge just that - a badge, and not an expression
of racism on my part. Now when it comes to Goblins that is quite a different matter and
as for cuddly root vegetables...
‘first morality binds and then morality blinds’ and slowly innocent people become as
shunned as Enid Blyton and her Gollywogs. It’s happened throughout history, but
usually to religious groups or races, not toys. Of course, the Robertson's Golly was and
is a racist icon if you want it to be, as was my knitted Gollywog too I suppose. But my
Golly was just a toy to me and my metal badge just that - a badge, and not an expression
of racism on my part. Now when it comes to Goblins that is quite a different matter and
as for cuddly root vegetables...
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