Chocolate mice, what’s that all about? Edibles don’t get
much worse do they? A slightly deformed
rodent made from greyish chocolate that actually tastes more of mouse than
chocolate.
So, Chocolate Week is almost over, did you notice it or did
it pass you by? It’s meant to be the nation’s favourite themed week and has
been running for ten years. Well, who would have guessed it? Of course it’s
mainly London
focussed and really just an opportunity for chocolate companies to get together
at Chocolate Show London to show off their latest chocolaty stuff. Chocolate
Show London, what a grand name – mind you chocolate makers call themselves
chocolatiers, so that’s hardly surprising.
Personally I don’t get the whole chocolate thing. I’m not a huge
fan and my relationship with the dark brown substance is patchy. Of course, as
a child I used to cram my face with a selection box or two at Christmas, but I
never really enjoyed the chocolate experience. I think that it was the lack of
chocolate for the rest of the year that made me do it, that and the fact that I
was piggy greedy. The Christmas tree was always covered in cheap, hollow,
chocolate baubles. Foil wrapped soldiers, shiny pine cones, even chocolate
stockings which were tied to the branches with thin golden string. We weren’t
allowed to eat them until after the Christmas tree needles had fallen all over
the lino and by then they just tasted of Christmas tree and dust.
At Easter it was all about chocolate eggs, although again I
never really got into the Easter chocolate thing. Easter was so boring – all
crucifixion and hot cross bun - a non-event and a hollow Easter egg or two was
never going to change that. This was before the big companies started filling
their eggs with mini-sweets, so all you got inside your egg was air. Besides, I
preferred Black Jacks, Fruit Salads, liquorice, and sherbet to Mars, Milky Ways ,
Bounties, and Chocolate Buttons.
Chocolate is a take it or leave it thing with me. I can go
months without a piece, then crave a Turkish Delight or a square of Fruit
and Nut. When I eat it I’m always disappointed with the taste; it never quite
lives up to the smell and I don’t like the texture of chocolate unless it’s
been in the fridge. I can’t stand hot drinking chocolate, chocolate spread,
chocolate cake, chocolate chip cookies, or even chocolate flavoured beer; and as
for white chocolate (which isn’t chocolate at all) it’s like eating milky
powdered dirt despite the Milky Bars being on me.
No, I’m not a chocolate lover as you probably realise by
now. I know that I’m in a minority, particularly among the ladies who scream
about chocolate being gorgeous, or heaven, or even to die for, but in all
honesty I don’t want to die for a Cadbury’s Cream Egg. In fact I can’t think of
anything worse; it’s a gooey, sugary, chocolate coated mess that tastes nothing
like an egg at all.
It doesn’t explain why I’m so fat though.
Richard Shore on FB
ReplyDeleteChocolate wine is much nicer than it sounds
Andrew Height
DeleteI may definitely try that maybe. Yes maybe definitely.
Paul Whitehouse on FB
ReplyDeleteOn the whole cheap chocolate is shit as we all know...the sort of stuff they sell on the markets. BUT there is one exception ....chocolate CHEWING NUTS ....some how the cheap choc really works and they are to die for!
Carmel Payne on FB
ReplyDeleteI so agree with that ^^^^^
Lynda Henderson on FB
ReplyDeleteBig toungued smiley face
Lynda Henderson
Neufchâtel in Oxford pa makes a fine truffle! Bruges, Belgium too, oh and this tiny shop in Amsterdam and ahahaha chocolate!!!
Lynda Henderson
Don't quite know how I did that giant tongue face??? But I guess it's appropriate.
5 hours ago · Unlike ·
Cloe Fyne on FB
ReplyDeleteLove chocolate nice. White ones and cheap choc dark ones! Not really chocolate though x
Andrew Height
DeleteYou were always a chocolate kid. You eat pounds and pounds of the stuff. Your face was always covered in chocolate smears.