Like cat and dog...

Look at those two.

Benjy often wanders up from the farm at weekends to see Misty. Benjy’s a nice dog, a bit excitable, maybe a little too ‘jumpy uppy’, but then he is very young. He’s Holly’s dog and she’s trying to calm him down but it’s hard when she only sees him at weekends and holidays….

“Hello cat, hello cat, hello cat… it’s good to see you again. Haven’t I grown? Aren’t I big? You okay? How about a game of chase the rabbit, chase the rabbit, chase the rabbit?”

Oh no… not him again… “What do you want?’

“Just thought I’d pop up for a chat cat, for a cat chat, for a chat cat, see what’s new, what’s new… do you want to play a game with me?”

“Not really.... do I look like I’m the sort of creature that runs around chasing rabbits? I’m not a dog you know, I’m a cat. When I hunt something I do it quietly, with stealth. When I hunt something they don’t know I’m there until it’s too late, that’s what cats do, cats are great hunters. Not like you dogs. When dogs hunt something you run around shouting ‘Helloooo, I’m here! I’ve come to catch you! Don’t run away now!’ I’ve heard you, you’re useless. When was the last time you caught anything?”

“ Well, I almost chased a sheep into its pen last week, and I almost did it quietly, and it was almost the right pen… it’s just that I got a bit excited and I went a bit wrong and instead of chasing it into the pen I chased myself into the pen and locked myself in. The Farmer had to let me out. It wasn’t my fault really, sheep are very exciting you know, all fluffy and they baaa a lot, that’s what made me so excited… baaa, baaa, baaa, baaa. Come on lets go catch a rabbit, a rabbit, a rabbit.”

“No thank you, I think that I’d prefer to sit here and watch you chasing your tail whilst the rabbits run rings around you. Anyway, I’m not really interested in rabbits unless they come in a can with extra jelly, and hunting is simply too much effort. Why hunt when your food is provided on a plate for you? Talking of which it must be nearly time for nin-nins. Bye Benjy, thanks for calling, off you go to catch your rabbit, I’m going indoors for some lovely nin-nins. Bye Benjy… and don’t rush back.”

“Bye cat. Sure that you won’t change your mind? There are lots of rabbits in the field, I’ve seen them, I’ll let you have first go and I’ll be quiet as quiet can be, honestly, honestly, honestly… come on cat, it’ll be fun…”

“Stupid dog. I don’t know why people love them so much, they haven’t got an ounce of dignity - and as for brains… well, they’re all instinct and rush. Man’s best friend? Man’s best fool more like. I may pop across to the field later and show him how it’s done if I can be bothered; after all he’s not such a bad dog as dogs go, they can’t help being stupid, and he is very friendly… just a little over-enthusiastic, enthusiastic, enthusiastic…”

There goes Benjy, all in a dash as usual, just look at him rushing around that field. If I didn’t know better I’d have sworn they were having a conversation. It looked just like they were chatting about something.

If they could talk to each other, I wonder what they’d talk about...