Saint Michael and the Devil...

I met the Devil today. Oh well, I’ve met him before. There he was running along by the side of the car grinning at me through his fingers. I don’t know why he does that but he does. It must be a satanic thing.

We’d shook him off by the time we got to Marizion and St Michael’s Mount. Perhaps that was why the Devil pulled back, St Michael is the chief opponent of the Devil and I’m sure he must have been around there somewhere.

We’ve been in Cornwall for almost a week now and I’ve learnt a few things about the place since the last time I visited twenty years or so ago.

Here are my top 10 learnings to date:

1. There is no parking in Cornwall.

2. 10 Cornish miles are the equivalent to 30 miles anywhere else.

3. There is no parking in Cornwall.

4. Wherever you are going in Cornwall you will end up somewhere else.

5. Where there is parking it isn’t where you want to be so be ready for a long walk to get to where you want to be.

6. There is plenty of parking in Supermarkets, but they are not where you want to be.

7. There are more supermarkets in Cornwall than anywhere else on the planet.

8. No through roads in Cornwall never have a turning point at the end of them.

9. There is no parking in Cornwall.

10. The pasties are delicious but they are often unavailable because the huge family in front of you just bought the lot.

Yes, I think it would be fair to say that those ten reasons alone explains why the Devil seems to particularly like Cornwall. He’s up to his Devil’s work putting swear words into my mouth and making me shake my fist at old ladies and children. I haven’t grown horns yet but I can feel them budding and the tail is coming along nicely.

Yes, I'm having a devil of a time.