22 sleeps to go - Father Christmas aka...

Poor old Father Christmas, he has to be suffering from some sort of identity crisis. He wanders the world for a single day and everywhere he goes he has a different name. He really must wonder just who he is and what he’s here for? Just like the rest of us really - well, me at least. Who is Father Christmas, and just how did he become a mince-pie-eating chimney slider?

The real Father Christmas was originally part of the old English Midwinter festival, dressed in green he didn’t come down chimneys or bring presents, he just wandered from house to house bringing good cheer and reminding people that spring was just around that proverbial corner. He was known as ‘Sir Christmas’, ‘Old Father Christmas’ or ‘Old Winter. It was the Victorians that made him dress in red on Christmas cards, it wasn’t even his colour.

Santa Claus was a Dutch American thing; trust them to clog up the issue. When the Dutch settlers founded New York they brought along the story of Sinter Klaas, the Dutch name for St Nicholas, a fourth century, red robed, Turkish bishop who cared for the poor and children. The story goes that one day he climbed on to a rooftop to drop a purse of gold down the chimney of a father unable to afford the wedding dowries of his three daughters and it landed in a stocking drying by the fire. Hence the chimney and stocking thing.

In Iceland they have Jólasveinarnir (the Yule Lads). Their number has varied throughout the ages, but currently there are considered to be around thirteen. Then there’s Le Père Fouettard; a sinister figure dressed in black who accompanies Santa dealing out the whip to any children who have behaved badly. In Spain and Puerto Rico, where there’s no Father Christmas, the gift-givers are the Three Kings: Melchor, Gaspar and Baltasar. To trump that, Jesus turns up in Mexico and Costa Rica dishing out the Christmas goodies.

Talking of Jesus, Kris Kringle, from the German Christkindl or Christkindlein, means Christ Child. Disturbed by the fact that the figure of Saint Nicholas was beginning to overshadow Jesus, reformer Martin Luther invented Christkindl, spreading the story that the Christ Child leaves secret presents for children, along with a dwarf-like being, known as Belsnickle. How cosy, Jesus and a dwarf entering your room on Christmas Eve night.

‘Pere Noel’ in France and Belgium, ‘Papai Noel’ in Brazil, ‘Old Man Christmas’ in Chile, ‘Christmas old man’ in China (trust them), ‘Kerstman’ in The Netherlands, ‘Babbo Natale’ in Italy, ‘Hoteiosho’ (a god) in Japan, ‘Julenissen’ the Christmas gnome in Norway, ‘Swiety Mikolaj’ (Sweaty Mike) in Poland, ‘Grandfather Frost’ in Russia, ‘Jultomten’ a Christmas brownie in Sweden, ‘Bellsnickle’ in old America, ‘Black Peter’ in Morocco, ‘Gwiazdor’ (which means star man from the North Star) in Northern Poland, ‘Chimney John’ in Wales, ‘Jouluppukki’ in Finland (which translates as Yule Goat - an ugly creature that frightened children), and plain old ‘Father Christmas’ to the rest of us.

Confused? No wonder the poor bugger needs to smoke.